Cracked Vessels

“I have seen his ways, and will heal him; I will also lead him, And restore comforts to him And to his mourners.”

-‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭57:18‬

This is kind of an incredible verse!

Here God is saying He has seen my ways — all my ways. Even the not-so-great ones. But instead of washing His hands of me He tells me He will heal me. Because I’m broken. My wandering ways are a result of my brokenness, and God not only acknowledges that, but He takes the brokenness and says “I am going to heal it”.

He doesn’t just say He’s had enough of me or my mistakes and failures. He heals me. He leads me. He restores me.

God is ready to take the broken, shattered pieces of my faults, my failures, my mistakes, and put them together. Once I realize that and finally let go of the pieces He Will put me together so that His Love and His Light can dwell in me and others can see that light in the cracks that make up my vessel.

So I lay down my pieces. I am done trying to put them together myself in all the wrong ways. How about you?

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There Is A Crack In The Door Filled With Light

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“The biggest and most disastrous moments  in a person’s life can be the most defining of a person’s character , and a person’s heart.” – David Willard

This month I’m hanging out in Joplin, Missouri for one of my rotations. My new roommates took me to this park across the street that is a memorial for the volunteers and those who were affected by the tornado in 2011. The entire park was beautiful and there were many great quotes and aspects, but one in particular caught my attention. That quote is the one above.

What happened in Joplin was devastating. 161 lives were lost. Homes, businesses, safe havens were all destroyed. Everyone in town lost something. Everyone in town was affected. And out of the devastation, they overcame. Out of the ashes, they rose.
The park is Joplin’s beauty.
The park is Joplin’s strength.

This park–this quote–helped to put things in perspective.

When tragedy hits, when disaster strikes, how do I react? Am I down and out or will I get up and find my strength?
How I react to the disasters in my life will define my character and my heart. It’s not easy to get back up when a storm knocks you down, physically or metaphorically, but if you can do it, you will come out that much stronger.

I’m in the process of getting myself back up. There are days I don’t want to get up in the morning. There are nights anger and sadness overwhelm me. And on my own I will never get up.
That’s where the beauty of grace comes in: “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness”(2 Cor 12:9).
When I place my trust in God, when I rely fully on Him, He will take my weakness, my inability to get back up, and He will lift me to heights I’ve never reached.

What you are going through is very real.
But you are not alone.
And this too shall pass.

I will leave you with a song that has comforted me the last couple weeks:

Take My Heart Rebuild It, My Soul Reignite It

The law of the LORD is perfect, converting [restoring] the soul -Psalm 19:7

How often do I pray and beg for God to restore my soul? How often do I say that I need a change of heart? How about every time I pray the conclusion of every hour–“sanctify my soul”? I say I want all of these things, but when it comes down to it, what am I doing on my end to obtain it?

Like everything else, grace comes from God. In the end, it’s all impossible without God’s grace. And like everything else, there’s a teeny tiny part for me to do as well. This verse is giving me the answer: “the law of the LORD…restoring the soul”. What does this mean to me? The law of God, His statutes, His testimonies, they will enable me to change my soul, to restore it to glory.

This is not just not committing adultery or not lying or stealing. This is the law that should be present in my everyday life–my canon–my spiritual rule. The only way to keep the connection open to receive God’s grace is by carrying out my spiritual rule.
For those of you who have been following me since my old blog, you know I love this topic. For everyone else, or even if you’d like to refresh yourself on what a spiritual rule entails, click here to read more. 

The only way to expect a restoration, a change in the desires of my heart, is by keeping the connection open. After all, isn’t that why nothing could get me down in Kenya? Anytime there was a hint of sadness creeping in, I ran to my Bible, I leaped to my agpeya. Never has my communication with Papa been stronger. The last few months, I’d personally been slack. I blamed it on my boards examination, and although that really isn’t a good excuse, boards are over. God blessed me with this huge revival the last couple weeks, and it’s time to build on it, not sink back into laziness.

So it’s time to make every day a Kenyan day. Once I do this, my words and my heart’s desires will truly be acceptable in the eyes of the Lord:
Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O LORD, my strength and my Redeemer (v. 14).

I will leave you with a link to my good friend’s song inspiring the title of this post: